Dating Blessed

I can’t say that my dating experience is all that huge but I can tell the difference between dating blessed and dating unblessed.

When I was dating my ex-husband, sure he took me out to nice places and some expensive dinners.  But my ex and I got physical fast and all to soon that was all the relationship was about.  I of course thought that I was getting love, when all he was getting was his physical needs met.

Not to say that my current boyfriend hasn’t taken me out to some very nice places, but we can be just as happy no where special just talking.

I was not staying within the laws of God and this caused me great guilt for my sin.  I knew better and as a Christian felt awful that I was breaking God’s commandment to stay pure.

I saw red flags in the relationship but since we had done the act I believed that in God’s eyes we were man and wife already so I better go through with it.  We had already made ourselves one flesh now it was time to just make it official.  It was a very unhappy and unblessed marriage the main reason is God was never truly invited into the relationship.  My ex had no leadership in this area and later in our marriage had no desire to have anything to do with God or anyone that had anything to do with Him.  Obviously I couldn’t stay in that environment.

I do not wish a divorce on anyone but now that my dating is blessed by God.  I would highly encourage you to invite God into your dating relationship.  If both of you are not willing to do that, that should be a warning sign of things to come.

Let me speak to the woman out there for just a moment.  You want a man that will lead you in all things but most importantly in spiritual matters.  I’m very fortunate because that is what I have now.  We pray together and praise God together.  We are looking into what verse to work on memorizing and looking at starting a Bible study together.  These are the type of qualities we all should be looking for in a husband.  Not that your man has to lead you in spiritual matters the exact same way that mine does, but you should be looking and praying for a man of God if you are dating and want God’s best for you.

This time my dating is different.  We are taking things slowly and this includes holding hands except for when we pray together.  We have had no need as of yet to have the physical boundary talk because we have done nothing other than hug. But when that time comes I know my limits and am ready to stand true to what God has shown me is all I can do.  Which by the world’s standards is not much.

Women be still give him the opportunity to lead and bless you by being the man of God of your dreams and then you too will be dating blessed.

A Woman After God’s Own Heart!

Honor Your Body

“The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.  Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself?  Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute?  Never!  Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body?  For it is said, ‘The two will become one flesh.’  But he who unites himself with the Lord is one with him in spirit.

Flee from sexual immorality.  All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.  Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?  You are not your own; you were bought with a price. Therefore honor God with your body.”

1 Corinthians 6:13b-20

There was a time looking at verse 20 “you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.”  I thought that that was all inclusive.  Meaning if I had eating issues I was not honoring God with my body. But if you look in context of the scripture that is not what it is saying.

Let’s start at verse 12 and go to 13a:

“‘Everything is permissible for me’ – but not everything is beneficial.  ‘Everything is permissible for me’ – but I will not be mastered by anything.  ‘Food is for the stomach and the stomach is for food’ – but God will destroy them both.”

As far as food is concerned the question is not is it permissible but is it beneficial. I had allowed food to become my master and that is where the problem is.  Nothing should be master over me other than my Precious Lord.

So the question then came to me if eating right was no longer how I honored God with my body what was it?  I had to look at the scripture in context and then it became very simply to know what God wanted of His children.  He even says it. “Flee sexual immorality!”

I’ve been single for 22 years and I know that this isn’t always a popular topic in any community to talk about.  In the secular community it isn’t politically correct to talk about sexual immorality.  As a matter of fact it is believed that sexual freedom is a part of our constitutional rights.

But those of us that follow God’s law are called to a higher standard.  We are called to sexual purity.  There is no place for sex outside of marriage!  It is Biblical.  It breaks my heart when I hear of Christians struggling in this area.  Not to say that I haven’t in my past but we have the fruits of the Spirit to help us one being self-control.

From my experiences if I go beyond where I can remain pure in not just body but mind as well, I’m sunk and self-control is out the window.  So I had to look at where my boundaries are for dating, since this recently became part of my life.  What can I do that will keep me pure physically and mentally.

This took some rigorous honesty with myself.  Is holding hands okay?  Is having his arm around me okay?  Yes as long as it is above the waste.  Is hugging alright? Definitely!  Is cuddling alright?  I think so.  Is kissing on the lips alright?  For me this is where I had to stop.  Kisses are very sexual to me and my mind then runs wild and sometimes my body.  So should it be God’s will that will wait for the man I marry, on my wedding day.

And oh will it be worth it!  You see I want to be as pure as possible and I want to do my best to avoid any traps the enemy may try to put in my way.  I want to be pleasing to God.

I also know that once the physical starts the talking and friendship development starts to suffer if you start to get to hot and heavy too fast.  With the right man I’ll have a lifetime for that.  But to find the right man is the most important thing and I don’t want to eliminate the courtship of learning about each other as friends and caring for that person without sex getting in the way.

I know my ways may sound foreign to many of you but I’m confident of this that my desires to please God and honor Him will be blessed.

If your in a relationship do yourself and your partner a favor and talk about what are your boundaries.  Do yourself the greatest favor and before you get together pray and seek God to help you find what is the best set of boundaries for you.  Then you can come together and see if you can honor one another’s boundaries.

Joy – A Woman After God’s Own Heart!